House and Hair Remodeling
Posted on | March 8, 2010 | 1 Comment
Michael and I are living in the chaos of contractors. Furniture has been piled in the center of rooms. Plastic is draped over everything. Drop clothes cover the floors. We are having the old 1963 wallpaper removed, the plaster walls repaired, and everything painted in bold, bold, BOLD colors.
The cats are loving it — that and the new kitty door we’ve put in the basement door so they can get back in the house when they slip into the basement while I’m doing laundry. Sleeping in the guest bedroom and hunting for clothes and other things that are buried under plastic and dust — I’m not really enjoying that so much, but it’s only for a couple more weeks.
So in the midst of redecorating the house, why not change our appearances as well? Michael is growing a beard and I bleached my dark brown hair. Last night we took the above picture on my laptop camera in the kitchen (one of the few rooms in the house not in a state of disarray). We look happy, and we are. Just having a fun evening in, fixing dinner together, making stupid jokes, and watching a movie on Netflix.
Nexus Deis
Posted on | March 4, 2010 | 2 Comments
Our connection (nexus) to the Divine (deis) lies close to our heartbeat, burns with a holy fire, and allows us to soar.
I honor and cherish the Divine within you and the connection between us.
Namaste.
digital collage created by Angela Raincatcher
Yes, there’s a conference for that.
Posted on | February 26, 2010 | 3 Comments
Tonight I am heading over to Ballston to attend the National Capital Region’s Pagan Leadership Conference. Every year someone asks me why I continue to go. Sometimes the agenda is not something I am interested in. Sometimes the town hall session becomes unbearable. Sometimes there is someone that I really don’t want to interact with who I know will be there. And yet if I don’t have a previous commitment on the calendar, I continue to go.
I find that I actually am looking forward to spending time with other pagans who lead groups and/or are very active in the local community. Swapping stories with people who share the same community organizer disease as I do (or “mad vision and masochism”) is fulfulling to me. Many of these folks are friends I see rarely because we live across the metropolitan area from each other (and we all know that pagans can’t cross running water like the Potomac River…or is that vampires?) and have calendars loaded with the day-to-day activities of coordinating an event or group of people. Other folks will have good ideas about how to handle the challenges we all face. I learn about new groups in the area and new events. I hear about how established groups and events are doing. And I get to meet new leaders, starry-eyed people who are just stepping out on the journey that I remember starting a decade ago. It helps with encroaching cynicism.
This year the official agenda is about financial responsibility, fundraising, and branding. Not personally my cup of tea, although I recognize how important these things are for the functioning of a group, and I believe we all can stand to learn more about them. But for me, as it has always been, it’s the people and the connections I establish and strengthen with my own kind.
Breathing Our Prayers
Posted on | February 25, 2010 | 2 Comments
About a month ago, I wrote about the magick of our breath. In our tradition, the season of Spring (early February through end of April) is the season of the element of Air and of the archetype of the Artist. We focus on our breath as the mover of life force, the meeting of spirit and body that is life triumphant. The breath is our spirit’s way of enlivening and animating the matter of the body. Attending to the breath links the conscious self to the other parts of our self, including our Divine Self, or our personal God/Goddess.
Our breath is our prayer to this Divine Self. Communing with that Spark is as natural as breathing in and out, filling ourselves with life and spirit. In Fifty Years in the Feri Tradition, Cora Anderson, one of the founders of the Feri Tradition and an influence in our tradition, tells us:
“The more natural and intimate your contact with the [Godself], the more sure you will be with the results of your prayer. You should pray first to your personal God before trying to contact other Gods. When this kind of prayer becomes as automatic as speaking to your loved ones, it is then possible to commune with the Gods in a loving wholesome way.”
And so, we practice the Ha Prayer, a prayer of breath and life force. There are several variations of this prayer, each tailored to a particular path or need within the individual. This is how I practice this prayer.
Bring your attention to the energy all around you. Bring your attention to your breath. Begin to beathe comfortably and deeply. Say “May all my souls be straight within me.”
Ask your Younger Self (or Fetch, Child Self, Lower Self, Wild Self, Unconscious) to store the energy you are about to take in.
Begin a four-count breath. For example, inhale to a count of three (or four or five or seven…), hold for a count of three, exhale fully to a count of three, and hold again for a count of three.
Breath in sets of 4 breaths until your body begins to tingle and you fill yourself full of life energy. I find it helpful to dedicate the first breath to my body, the second to my Younger Self, the third to my Conscious Self, and the fourth to my God Self. This round repeats for 8, 12, or 16 breaths.
When you are well charged, ask your Younger Self to direct the energy where it is most needed to align your souls and create a clear channel of energy within you. Trust your Younger Self to know what to do.
On the last breath, tilt your head back as you breathe out and blow a breath of air upwards. Send the energized breath to your God Self, which you visualize as a ball of blue fire floating above your head.
By “feeding” your God Self in this manner, you are stepping on the path of connecting and communing directly with that part of you that is eternal, which is our link to the gods. As my teacher, Katrina Messenger, says, “our acceptance of the blessings of the gods is our greatest gift to them.” The Ha Prayer is both an offering and an acceptance of the love and life of the universe.
May you be ever so blessed.
Sacred Dove Mandala (c) 2010
New Jewelry
Posted on | February 10, 2010 | 2 Comments
I’ve spent several days indoors with the Great Mid-Atlantic Snowpocalypse of 2010. After messing around some and doing some work from home, I got down to being creative. I pulled out all my beads, got reacquainted with them, and made three necklaces. The one above is my Woodland Faerie Queen necklace, which I’m offering for sale on my Etsy shop. The other two are private commissions, but I wanted to share them with you all anyway.
Drawing What Makes Us Unconfortable
Posted on | January 28, 2010 | No Comments
I’m linking this post to the one right before. I think they make sense together, but what do I know.
This last weekend, I participated in a workshop, Awakening Creativity Through Spiritual Practice, taught by Sylvan at Reflections Mystery School. You know you’re in trouble when your response to a trance is, “Whoa! Deep! F**k!” The big message I took away for my artistic work is to draw the pictures that I am afraid to draw, that I am afraid to be seen by others.
I even committed–outloud and in front of others–to do just that. I have experienced a tremendous amount of anxiety over this for years and kept myself to positive, beautiful, uplifting, and safe subjects. But that doesn’t seem to be what I need to draw and paint. The thought terrifies me, and yet there is so much energy here, which usually means there is much power waiting to be released and used. That is one of the lessons I have learned in working to integrate my Shadows. That, and “to attend to where the energy is”–a corollary of “energy follows attention.”
Today’s post over at Seth Godin’s blog deals with the resistance to actively and successfully moving toward our dreams. He talks about the lizard brain, or amygdala. From scholarpedia, I learned that the amygdala has been implicated in the processing and memory of emotional states, such as fear, aggression, maternal feelings, sexual urges, and ingestive (eating and drinking) behaviors. And yes, all of those are subject matter for the images that are bumping up against the surface of my conscious wanting out.
Last night I took the first steps by looking for stock photos for reference, taking some of my own with my little digital camera, and doing some sketches. It wasn’t as bad as I feared. The anxiety is lessened but not gone.
How does this relate to my last post? Perhaps this is a boundary I must cross to follow the holy man on fire. Perhaps that is just one aspect of my animus. Perhaps this crossing and expanding of my personal boundaries is necessary to grow both in my art and my spirituality.
I don’t know exactly. Maybe it doesn’t make rational sense. But as the BlissChick wrote today, I will follow the breadcrumbs.
Following the Man on Fire
Posted on | January 26, 2010 | 4 Comments
I have delayed posting this as I tracked down the “perfect” image to illustrate it. I’m not finding it, which may be a clue that I need to create it, or that finding that image is not the point.
Last week, I had a dream. Actually, I usually dream, but every once in a while the dream image is very clear, clear enough to remember, clear enough to stick with me. This is one such dream.
I am walking through a marketplace that looks much like a medieval fair, but dirtier. People all around me are sick and dying. I am slowly walking and watching them. My heart goes out to them as they shuffle in the shadows of alleys and doorways. Occasionally, one will cross my path and make me stop in my tracks. There is a moment of awkwardness before the other shuffles off, and I continue.
At the center of the marketplace, I find my teacher elder, a wizened old woman with a round face and eyes. She is tiny, wrapped in cloth to stay warm by a small fire. She may be old, but she is not one of the sick. She is timeless. I sit across from her, and we talk.
A man about my age comes and sits around the fire between us. He is wearing a roughly woven, brown robe, much like a monk’s. He has dark brown, curling hair and a kind, yet compelling eyes. I feel a flash of connection when our eyes meet. We don’t speak much to each other, but both listen to the elder. A spark from the fire flies out and lands on his sleeve. A small fire spreads over his arm and hand, but doesn’t seem to burn him. He reaches over and taps out or covers the fire with his other hand. He gives me an embarrassed look, as if I have seen something that he usually tries to hide. He is surprised that I have seen it.
Unhurriedly, he rises to leave and walks away. I follow him. I know in that moment that I will always follow him, no matter at what cost–to my life or my reputation. And I know that it will be OK.
Early in December I made the intent to begin a conscious relationship with my animus. I believe this dream is saying that I am on the right track, but that I will have to take risks. My life is pretty “safe” right now, but sometimes I feel that I am on a knife’s edge, that I want to play with fire.
Yet, I am afraid. Afraid of losing control of my mind. Afraid of losing the respect of others, of losing my good name. Afraid that my work (especially my artwork) will make people seriously question my sanity or good spirit. So, I am usually “good” or “pleasing” and sometimes “inspiring,” or so I’ve been told.
But I think that may be changing, which I’ll talk about in my next post.
Magic of Breath
Posted on | January 20, 2010 | No Comments
Ghost of the Spirit by Chris Luckhardt, http://www.flickr.com/photos/motionblur/ / CC BY-NC-SA 2.0
Today, I am reminded, not “to breathe,” but to bring my awareness to my breath.
Breath is life.
Breath is magic.
Breath is both body and spirit.
As I have learned from various teachers including my mother, energy follows attention. So, if I attend to my breath, I am attending to life here and now. I am attending to my body and my spirit. I am bringing energy to life and magic, body and spirit.
Just by paying attention to my breath.
I notice that as I am writing this, Pandora is playing “Breathe” by Telepopmusik. “Just breath. Just believe.” How synchronous is that?!
Winter’s Daily Practice
Posted on | January 7, 2010 | 1 Comment
At Reflections Mystery School, we have seasonal daily practices that correspond to the element of the season: Earth in Winter, Air in Spring, Fire in Summer, and Water in Autumn. These daily practices are meant to connect us in a physical and energetic way to the element of the season.
In the Winter, we ground energetically and we massage our feet.
Grounding brings us back to the present, back to our bodies. Here and now, we are effective agents of our Work. We are only able to answer the call of our vocation by being fully present. When our minds and our energy is scattered this way and that, like tangled yarn batted about by a small kitten, nothing makes sense. Threads that look like they lead somewhere double back on themselves and leave us feeling frustrated and overwhelmed. Taking the time to bring our awareness back and finding that still point inside of us gives us the space to listen and move with intent and purpose.
Massaging our feet further focuses our attention to the parts of ourselves that actually move us around this physical plane. When we practice an embodied spirituality, being aware of and taking care of our bodies is a holy act. Our bodies have a great deal to teach us, if we take the time to learn. Our bodies have a great dealt to tell us, if we take the time to listen. Massaging the feet communicates to the body that we do value its messages, that we consider it sacred and worthy of our attention.
Every year, someone asks of our teacher “how is massaging my feet a spiritual or magical practice?” She has her own answer, and mine may be quite similar. There is a saying about magic that energy follows attention. When we pay attention to our feet (our bodies) and care of them as holy, then the energy of healing and love flow to them and to all they do and represent to us: mobility, foundation, support, strength.
Our feet are the foundation of our bodies much as daily practice is a foundation of our spirituality.
Related posts that inspired me to write today:
Katrina Messenger on Radical Self-Care
Ketzirah on Sustainable Spirituality
Christine Valters Paintner on The Exquisite Tenderness of Bodies
Photo of my feet and my husband’s feet on vacation at the Delaware seashore, 2008.
2009 Creations
Posted on | January 4, 2010 | No Comments
Just a little mosaic of some of the artwork I did this last year. Clockwise from upper left: Happy Buddha mala, Bastet shrine, photography that I plan to use for artwork in future, Chango shrine, healing altar, Ganesha and Hanuman altar, Strength, cosmic building blocks, touch drawing, beaded necklaces, Oggun shrine.
Looking at this is making me excited about creating more this year. And I am in love with bold colors! Wow!
Now if only the house sprites would return my portfolio of Touch Drawings from this summer’s Gathering and my black knitting bag with all my needles. Please! I have two projects that I desperately want to work on now. Maybe a little butter offering is in order.
keep looking »Services
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